Movie Cranks,
We did it, we knocked another one off the list of ‘Movies that I should have probably seen in 2006 but never really cared to’. We watched Crank.
It turns out I’ve never watched any Nevaldine/Tayor joints, but the filmography is stellar. Crank, Crank: High Voltage, Gamer, Jonah Hex, Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance
It’s described as ‘A stripped down action ride’ which could also be described as ‘Plot-light’, I mean there is a plot right? I’m sure there’s a plot. I think he was poisoned by some Latin gangster for doing some unauthorized hits.. or something… blahhh…
CRANK!
So then thanks to Fat Dwight Yokum hearing the description of ‘I feel tired and have blurry vision’ over the phone, he gets the explanation that he MUST have been given the Beijing Cocktail! And now he has to keep his adrenaline up or he will die.
CRANK!
So he goes to some gangsters house and tries to find out some plot information, but they were apparently going to double cross him, or he just felt the urge to CRANK! so he punches his way out of there and gets into a grand theft auto style car chase. Which ends with him driving through a wall and crashing on an escalator (which is actually pretty funny).
CRANK!
This is where i kind of lose the plot because I wasn’t taking this assignment serious. So I might be missing something! So he gets (2006 hot Amy Smart) and tries to calmly get her to leave the house and come with him, which kind of reminds me, has anyone seen “The Big Hit”… that’s a movie that we should watch… but back to the CRANK! damn, he convinces her to have sex in public with MOVES THAT WOULD NEVER WORK. This is the most unrealistic part of this movie, 100%. But it is hilarious to watch a bunch of Asian people cheer them on! Funny that she knows that he’ll just fall asleep afterward… and die.
After this there’s some kind of standoff with the gangs, some hilarious deaths, some gruesome arm chopping off. Probably all important to the plot, but it’s all the action action shit that I forget instantly. I did think it was cool that it was really Statham in the helicopter over LA. and in the end, he throws the little bitch villain out of the helicopter and rides his ass to the ground… and bounces? CRANK… 2…
I’m still lost on several plot points but yeah, I’d watch Crank 2 just to learn how he survived the “world’s longest free fall in helicopter history”.
Q
None of this means that I won’t eventually watch CRANK 2, but not next week. Because Q has hyped up his pick for 3
weeks, so it better be THE ROOM LEVEL!
Tomorrow at 8, Be there!
Crank, Mark
Crank is a 2006 American action film written and directed by Mark Neveldine and Brian Taylor (in their directorial debuts) and starring Jason Statham, Amy Smart and Jose Pablo Cantillo. The plot centres on a British hitman based in Los Angeles named Chev Chelios who is poisoned and must keep his adrenaline flowing constantly in order to keep himself alive. He does so by various methods including taking drugs and getting into fights, while he tries to track down the man who poisoned him. The title of the film comes from the slang word for methamphetamine.
The film was followed by a sequel, titled Crank: High Voltage, in 2009.
source : wikipedia
